We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Vanessa Shields. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Vanessa below.
Vanessa, we’re thrilled to have you sharing your thoughts and lessons with our community. So, for folks who are at a stage in their life or career where they are trying to be more resilient, can you share where you get your resilience from?
That’s a great question and one I have asked myself many times. There have been several moments where it took everything in me to keep moving forward, specifically when I was getting out of an abusive marriage and dealing with cancer simultaneously. And as a casualty of the cancer, I live with chronic pain that is a battle in itself most days.
I don’t have a clear answer, but I think that some people are just better suited to handle adversity whether that is something they are born with or the environment they were raised in. For me, I think growing up in a loving family helped build a solid foundation early on so that when life hit me like a tornado, I could weather the storm. That said, it took me a few years to fully get past the worst of it but each month I got stronger emotionally and mentally.
With my marriage over and I losing my fertility to cancer it was hard to fully accept my new reality for a while. But in a positive way I was able to start fresh, sketch out what I wanted from life, and see what that would look like.
Resilience takes work and it is something I have had to work on daily and still do today. I have had to keep reminding myself what my goals are and stick to the path that will allow me to reach them. I think like most people, I want a better life and want to make the most of it while I am here.
Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
I grew up in North County San Diego but have lived in NYC and Portland, Oregon for a total of nine years before returning back to San Diego, CA. From a young age I began traveling the world with my family visiting 8 countries by the time I graduated high school. At 14 I had the opportunity to live in Europe with my aunt and from that point on I was in love with travel and everything that it entailed.
Currently I am the creator of Traveling Ness focusing on mid-level to luxury travel highlighting adventure and unique activities around the globe. Although I am primarily a solo traveler, I do enjoy taking trips with my parents from time to time. They love that I plan and handle everything and as a bonus I get to have that quality time with them.
For me, the best way to understand a culture and its history is through my love of food and wine. In fact, my love of wine has spurred a new career that I enjoy in conjunction with travel writing. I work in sales representing a portfolio of vineyards all around the world that has given me the opportunity to travel to meet with some amazing winemakers.
I am also in the process of completing my WSET 3 course which will provide the knowledge of a sommelier once I am finished. I believe that wine is travel in a bottle. Each time you sip a wine from a particular region you are getting the essence of the place, climate, and history all in one.
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
Curiosity – From as far back as I can remember I have been asking questions, way too many if you had asked my mom back in the day. That curiosity led to being a voracious reader. I used to get in trouble for reading too much past bedtime. This was before the internet and smart phones so I would read to learn about places in the world and envision what it would look like to visit one day. It’s why one of my favorite parts of traveling is to research and plan a trip. To learn about a culture and what makes it so unique is something I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of.
Independence – Being an only child I had to be independent out of necessity but eventually that turned into a very valuable quality as a solo traveler. Sure, I may get a little anxious visiting a new destination at times, but my independence has allowed me to push through any nerves. I am very comfortable being alone whether at home or abroad, which has become an asset when traveling solo.
Determination – Or maybe it’s being stubborn depending on who you ask! It has given me the ability to move past my fears and hesitation in unknown situations. And it has helped to drive me forward in the difficult times, never giving up on my goals.
For those that are hesitant on taking a trip solo, half the battle is just getting on that plane. You’ll surprise yourself with how capable you can be in the moment, especially when you have no one else to depend on. I’ve learned that getting out of your comfort zone can be a bit uncomfortable at the time but in the long run it allows you to grow as a person and become stronger.
What is the number one obstacle or challenge you are currently facing and what are you doing to try to resolve or overcome this challenge?
Myself. After the end of my marriage both the mental and physical abuse led to me experiencing PTSD and severe anxiety. For months I feared going out in public and avoided social situations at all costs. I almost think the mental abuse was worse as words can leave such an imprint and at least short term really define what you think of yourself.
In starting Traveling Ness, I questioned whether I could be successful, whether anyone would see value in my advice and recommendations. Even though I had a few decades of travel under my belt, there was that part of me that felt like a failure even before I started. A lot of that came from the abuse of my ex. I have had to retrain my brain to not only think but believe I am good enough no matter what I choose to do.
At least once a month I learn a new tool or skill that will help me in growing my business behind Traveling Ness. Gaining knowledge helps build confidence. The more you know the more options and resources you have to make better decisions. And it doesn’t hurt hopping on a plane to a new destination. Travel in my opinion is the best confidence booster. It has shown me that I am more capable than I give myself credit for.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.travelingness.com/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/travelingness/
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/TravelingNess
- Other: https://www.tiktok.com/@travelingness8
