Meet Zuri Pryor-Graves

We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Zuri Pryor-Graves. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Zuri below.

Zuri, thank you so much for joining us today. Let’s jump right into something we’re really interested in hearing about from you – being the only one in the room. So many of us find ourselves as the only woman in the room, the only immigrant or the only artist in the room, etc. Can you talk to us about how you have learned to be effective and successful in situations where you are the only one in the room like you?

I’ve often found myself as “the only one in the room,” a role I’ve grown accustomed to throughout my life.

Growing up as an only child just blocks away from the projects in NW Roanoke, VA, my journey was shaped by the unwavering support of my incredible single mother. Despite the challenges, she ensured I received the best education possible, even if it meant driving me across town every day for 12 years to attend a predominantly white college preparatory institution. In each grade, I was the sole black girl, navigating spaces where I stood out in countless ways most people can’t imagine. While it could have been easy to fade into the background, my mother instilled in me a drive to exceed expectations and blaze my own trail from an early age.

Instead of settling for mediocrity, insecurity, or trying to blend in, I embraced being the only one, seeing it as an opportunity to make a lasting impression. With confidence, resilience, and humility, I became a presence that seamlessly blended into any environment while still retaining my unique, quirky identity.

My mother’s teachings encouraged me to relentlessly pursue my passions, regardless of societal norms or the lack of representation. This foundation set the stage for an extraordinary journey, full of unexpected twists and turns that set me apart from my surroundings. In addition to reaching common milestones, I explored uncharted territories in music, art, sports, advocacy, education, writing, and more. In each of these endeavors, I often found myself as the sole representative of my race, gender, sexuality, and identity, shaping my experiences in many aspects of my life.

Consequently, I’ve become a multifaceted individual—a DJ, writer, skater, motorcycle rider, member of various organizations, an academic, an artist, and much more, including membership in Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, INC, Alpha Kappa Psi Professional Business Fraternity, being a Howard University Alum, and holding multiple post-graduate degrees while currently pursuing a PhD. Starting as “the only one” propelled me to create my own community, supporting others who have experienced similar isolation until we found solidarity in one another.

Now, in a career path that may seem foreign to many, I serve as a department of one within a larger industry, shaping the role of an Intimacy Coordinator and on-set Mental Health Consultant. As a Black, queer, certified sex therapist and sexologist turned Intimacy Coordinator, I navigate uncharted waters, drawing from the lessons learned and the resilience cultivated during my years as “the only one.”Top of Form

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Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?

Of Course! Hey there folx! I’m Zuri Pryor-Graves (she/her), and I’m all about shaking up the conversation around sexuality in the entertainment industry. As a Sexuality Professional and Sexpert based in Atlanta, I’ve made it my mission to advocate for authenticity and consent both on and off the screen.
Certified by SAG-AFTRA and Intimacy Coordinators and Directors International, I bring a ton of experience to the table as an Intimacy Coordinator. But that’s just one piece of the puzzle. I wear many hats, from being a Sex Therapist and Sexologist to serving as an On-Set Therapist, Sexual Educator, and even working on becoming a sex and relationship specialist in front of the camera.

My journey has taken me to some pretty cool places, including big-name platforms like HBO, BET, Starz, AppleTV, Hulu, Prime, and Netflix. But beyond the glitz and glamour, I’m all about fostering a culture of respect and inclusivity in the industry. With a background in sexuality therapy, mental health, and TV/film production, I thrive in the fast-paced world of intimacy coordination. I’m passionate about bringing my expertise in movement, anti-harassment practices, and trauma work to the table, along with a deep understanding of LGBTQ issues, kink/BDSM, and alternative relationship structures.

As a therapist, I lead workshops on everything from LGBTQ topics to consent culture and sex positivity. My diverse background in acting, stunt performance, and radio hosting gives me a unique perspective on the industry, and I’m constantly striving to create safer, more inclusive sets.
With certifications in gender, sexuality, race, disability competency, and Mental Health First Aid, I’m ready to tackle any challenge and contribute to making the entertainment world a better, more inclusive place for everyone.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
Absolutely, diving deep into the world of sexuality, TV, and film has been quite the journey for me. I’d say there are three big things that have really shaped the way I operate:

First up, it’s all about intersectional understanding. This means recognizing how different aspects of identity—like race, gender, sexuality, and class—intersect and impact each other. Having this understanding has been key for me as an Intimacy Coordinator. It helps me navigate the industry with sensitivity and nuance, ensuring that intimacy scenes are authentic and respectful while pushing for more inclusivity and representation.

Then, there’s adaptability and creativity. You know, the entertainment biz is always changing, throwing new challenges our way. So, being able to think on my feet and come up with creative solutions has been crucial. Whether it’s finding new ways to approach intimacy coordination or pushing for industry-wide change, being adaptable and creative has really helped me stay ahead of the curve.

Last but not least, empathy and communication. These two go hand in hand for me. Whether I’m working as a therapist, educator, or Intimacy Coordinator, creating safe and supportive spaces is always a top priority. That means really listening to people and making sure they feel heard and understood. Good communication is key too—being able to talk openly and respectfully with everyone involved in a production is essential for creating a positive and inclusive working environment.

So yeah, these qualities—intersectional understanding, adaptability and creativity, empathy and communication—have been the backbone of my journey so far. They’ve not only helped me grow personally but have also shaped the way I contribute to the industry. My goal? To keep pushing for authenticity, diversity, and consent in everything I do. And love…also being filled with and filling others around me with love!

For individuals who are early in their journey and seeking to develop or improve upon the qualities, skills, and areas of knowledge mentioned, I offer the following advice:

  1. Get out there and mix it up (Seek Diverse Perspectives and Experiences): Hang with different crowds, read widely, and listen to folks who challenge your views. It’ll open your eyes and make you a pro at navigating social stuff.
  2. Keep the learning train rolling (Embrace Continuous Learning and Growth): Dive into courses, workshops, and mentorship gigs. Embrace feedback—even the tough stuff—it’s how you grow.
  3. Talk the talk (Develop Strong Communication Skills): Work on your communication chops, from speaking up to active listening. And hey, remember, it’s not just about info—it’s about building trust and sorting out conflicts too.
  4. Think outside the box (Cultivate Creativity and Adaptability): Get creative, try new things, and don’t sweat the failures. Change is the name of the game, so be ready to roll with it.
  5. Take a breather and look inward (Prioritize Self-Reflection and Personal Growth): Reflect on what makes you tick, recharge your batteries, and cut yourself some slack. Growth’s all about progress, not perfection.

So, my two cents: when you really embrace these principles and keep pushing yourself to grow, that’s when the magic happens. You start developing all the qualities and skills you need to navigate life’s twists and turns, make a real impact in your community, and build a career that truly lights you up. It’s all about that constant growth and evolution that you can be proud of, you know?

Do you think it’s better to go all in on our strengths or to try to be more well-rounded by investing effort on improving areas you aren’t as strong in?

So, here’s the deal with focusing on strengths versus working on weaknesses—it’s a bit of a mixed bag, you know? For me, though, I’m all about finding a sweet spot right in the middle.

First up, strengths. You gotta love ’em, right? When you’re rocking your strengths, it’s like you’re playing on your home turf. It’s where you shine brightest, where you feel most confident, and where you can really make a difference. Plus, it’s just plain fun.

But hey, we can’t ignore the weak spots either. Sure, they’re not as glamorous, but working on those areas where we’re not quite as strong? That’s where the real growth happens. It’s like leveling up in a video game—you tackle the tough stuff, and suddenly, you’re stronger, more versatile, and ready to take on whatever comes your way.

Now, finding that balance? That’s the real trick. It’s about embracing your strengths while also being real about where you could use some improvement. For me, as an intimacy coordinator and sex therapist, it’s all about bringing my therapy skills to the table while also diving headfirst into the nitty-gritty of the entertainment biz.

At first, I leaned hard on my mental health background, which was great for providing support and empathy. But I quickly realized I needed to up my game in terms of industry know-how. So, I dove into training, sought out mentors, and basically did whatever it took to level up my skills and learn the television and film world inside out.

Nowadays, I’m all about that balanced approach. I bring my mental health A-game to every project because that is my foundational strength, but I’m also constantly learning and growing as an intimacy coordinator and contributing to the growth of the intimacy coordination profession. And you know what? This approach has made me better at both. So yeah, balance is key—and it’s totally worth the effort.

Next up, continuing to expand the world of Intimacy Coordination, separately grow in Mental Health Coordination On-Set, finish up my PHd program in Psych, and hop more in front of the camera, leveraging these strengths and that balance as your new household Dr. Ruth. Watch out! *wink*

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