Sarah Gardner’s Stories, Lessons & Insights

Sarah Gardner shared their story and experiences with us recently and you can find our conversation below.

Hi Sarah, thank you so much for joining us today. We’re thrilled to learn more about your journey, values and what you are currently working on. Let’s start with an ice breaker: Have you ever been glad you didn’t act fast?
My answer to this question is “Yes.” There have, in fact, been a few moments during my creative business journey where I felt pressure to “act fast,” but I didn’t. This pressure seems to come from external forces, that sense of FOMO you feel in the pit of your stomach when you think you’re passing up an opportunity. And it comes from an atmosphere of comparison and competition amplified by social media. It seems like we can get caught up in an urgency to put our ideas out there before someone else does. Or, I may have had big plans to do something sooner, but I just didn’t get it together. Rather than beating myself up over it, though, I focused on the present moment, and whether what I was doing right then felt right…to me. Most of the time, I didn’t “miss out.” In fact, the extra time I “gave myself” allowed the idea or plan to congeal and perhaps go in a slightly better direction in the end. So I have come to embrace the timing of things. I’m trusting that things will work out if I stay true to myself instead of succumbing to all that external pressure.

Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
I am a mixed media artist and teacher, and author of “Share Your Joy: Mixed Media Shareable Art.” I’m also a practicing lawyer and a mom. My creative business is called Juicy*S Art. Juicy*S is my DJ name. I’m not a DJ, but is it a fantasy, dream job of mine to be one.

What I am is a recovering perfectionist and over-thinker extraordinaire. The creative practice that has evolved into the business of teaching and writing, began as, and continues to be, my self care. Playing with a bunch of art supplies in an intuitive way brings me into the present moment, and out of my head. Over many years of creating in this way, I’ve been able to rewire my brain. As I’m creating, I can embrace uncertainty and imperfection. I have come to learn that often, mistakes turn out to be the best part. I give myself the grace of being able to learn by trial and error instead of judging every move I make along the way, worrying how something is going to turn out. I’m not in production mode, trying to “produce” something perfect.

I know now that it’s the process of creating that brings me joy, not the perfect end result. I feel called to teach about this process. I want to teach mixed media techniques so that students can feel successful. But it goes beyond the simple how-to, for me. What I really hope to convey in all my classes is a mindset around creativity. This mindset is an openness to discovery, an attitude of kindness toward ourselves, and a willingness to embrace uncertainty. Then, each step in the process is an experience of joy.

Since the publication of my book, the focus of my creative practice has been on shareable art. When we experience the joy of creating something we love, and then share it, we’re sharing our joy.

Thanks for sharing that. Would love to go back in time and hear about how your past might have impacted who you are today. What part of you has served its purpose and must now be released?
I definitely feel that my perfectionistic inner critic is no longer a persuasive voice in my head. That voice had me doubting myself for a long time. It had convinced me that I shouldn’t try anything new unless I could do it perfectly…without ever having learned how to do it! I feel a lot more sane and so free now that I can ignore that voice, and I have my creative practice to thank for this. I’m a self-taught mixed media artist, and that means that I DID try a bunch of new things and learned a lot in the process. When you’re free from perfectionism, you’re no longer pursuing that one perfect way something has to be…which is impossible, by the way. You are open to and can see more possibilities, so creativity expands. After years of engaging in this practice, I realize that dwelling in possibility is so much more exciting than seeking perfection.

What have been the defining wounds of your life—and how have you healed them?
I’m pretty sure that my attachment wounds of not feeling seen, heard or cared for as a child were very defining for me. I’m sure my experience was pretty common in 1964 when I was conceived by my unmarried parents. It was without question that they would marry, given my mom’s Catholic upbringing. But they were miserable, and I was the reason. I didn’t realize until pretty recently (in therapy) that my feelings of inadequacy, self-doubt, and my perfectionism, stem from my younger self feeling like no one was all that interested in her, and even resented her. My adaptations to this disinterest and my deep loneliness (even with two younger siblings), were to stay out of the way, be quiet and not get noticed, and strive to be always perfect, so that I might be loved. I survived and I comforted myself as best as a child could, and the attitude of “it’s all up to me,” helped me actually thrive. But my healing really took place when I got tongue cancer in 2018. This experience taught me that I am worthy and loved and not alone. I just needed to reach out to those in my life who actually cared for me, for support. You see, I was always the one helping, “there for” others, thinking my self-worth depended on being the perfect helper. Ironically, tongue cancer allowed me to put myself out there to be seen and “heard” and loved, for who I am. I have embraced my resilience, and allowed love in. And I don’t succumb to self-doubt and perfectionism very often.

Next, maybe we can discuss some of your foundational philosophies and views? Is the public version of you the real you?
I would say mostly yes to this question. It’s hard for me to be fake even though I spent years of my life trying to be what everyone else in my life seemed to need me to be! Many people have told me that my art is full of love and happiness, and I believe this is true. I’m happiest when I’m creating, and I make what gives me joy. The process of creating has proved to be a profound and healing mindfulness practice for me. I love to find links between the experience of creating and the research and writing from neuroscience, polyvagal theory, positive psychology, gratefulness, play, and social genomics. These are such fascinating areas in and of themselves. Linking them to the brain state I’m in as I create is very exciting to me. I often discuss these topics and specific authors and research in the online mixed media art classes I teach. I believe that we can all embrace our creativity-that part of us that is uniquely human and specifically ‘us.” And that when we do so, we can enjoy healing and wellness as a result. I think this comes through in my art, my writing, and my teaching.

Okay, so let’s keep going with one more question that means a lot to us: Are you doing what you were born to do—or what you were told to do?
I finally feel that I am doing what I was born to do. I stopped doubting myself (as often), and started taking the risk of being myself. I am listening to what I feel “called” to do. I had a conversation with a friend recently, in which she told me that she’d been trying to let herself go into her garden and just play without feeling like it was a project that needed doing. I told her that she must listen to that need because it was a calling. I feel if you listen, and do what you are called to do, you cannot go wrong. The issue is that our culture and conditioning makes us feel like we have to get all the weeding done every time we’re in the garden, so to speak. We have such a fixation on productivity, we find it difficult to listen to the voices that call to us about the needs and dreams we were born to pursue for our own, unique, true selves. In one of the books I read about the polyvagal theory (Accessing the Healing Power of the Vagus Nerve by Stanley Rosenberg), there is a quote that really speaks to this: “What is the dream that you had for your life?” It’s hard for us to remember that dream. I believe it is the whole point of living, but we still have to pay the bills.

Contact Info:

Suggest a Story: BoldJourney is built on recommendations from the community; it’s how we uncover hidden gems,
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
Highlighter Series
Is the public version of you the real you?

We all think we’re being real—whether in public or in private—but the deeper challenge is

Highlighter Series
Have any recent moments made you laugh or feel proud?

We asked some of the most interesting entrepreneurs and creatives to open up about recent

Highlighter Series
What do the first 90 minutes of your day look like?

Coffee? Workouts? Hitting the snooze button 14 times? Everyone has their morning ritual and we