We’re looking forward to introducing you to Tina Pelkowski. Check out our conversation below.
Tina, really appreciate you sharing your stories and insights with us. The world would have so much more understanding and empathy if we all were a bit more open about our stories and how they have helped shaped our journey and worldview. Let’s jump in with a fun one: What are you being called to do now, that you may have been afraid of before?
I believe I’ve finally reached a point in my career where I can transition into illustrating full-time! It’s a really exciting step for me, but it’s also always been kind of daunting. Until now, I’ve still been balancing a full-time job while freelancing on the side which has been a safe option for me in that it gave me the time to build my business little by little. Recently its been feeling a little more suffocating, though. Devoting my time and energy to both seemed less and less feasible once I (blessedly) started having a steady flow of incoming commissions. When it reached the point that I was turning people away, I had a moment of clarity. I had to face the fear of branching out on my own and commit to make a real attempt at freelancing full-time. I want to give it my all for my clients and myself. I finally feel ready!
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
I’m Tina Carbone (newly Mrs. Pelkowski!) and I am a New York-based illustrator known by the pseudonym Palesile on social media. I majored in illustration and graduated with an AA from the Academy of Art University, and a BFA from the Rocky Mountain College of Art & Design.
I have always been fascinated by various forms of storytelling, You can always find me with my nose in a book or wiping my eyes after a great film. I’ve always been enthusiastically appreciative of animation, though I’ve yet to be brave enough to really delve into the artform myself. My primary medium is digital painting and design using Procreate. I take pride in my extensive collection of books (there aren’t enough shelves in the world, yet!) and musical taste, all which tremendously inspire me to create.
I’m obsessed with love, romance, and all things whimsical including magic – and that’s always something I hope to convey in my work.
Right now, I’ve found my groove in working with authors to bring their books to life. I’ve been blessed to work on some beautiful covers, characters, and scenes for book interiors. It brings me so much joy, I can’t wait to continue down this path!
Amazing, so let’s take a moment to go back in time. Who saw you clearly before you could see yourself?
For this I have to thank my husband, Kevin (we just got married this July!) and my family. My family are my day ones, they’ve always been there cheering me on to be an artist and I love them for that. I can thank my mom for encouraging me to pursue art school, I learned a lot there and it greatly contributes to my skills today. But I think there’s a little seedling of doubt that has always been in my ear saying “they’re your family, they HAVE to say that,” haha.
When I met Kevin, I felt truly seen for the first time in my life. There was no pressure, no pretense, no pretending, no mask. I couldn’t explain how, but I was free to be my true self around him, and he loved every bit of it. Kevin has helped grow my confidence, my love of self, and belief in my work and abilities exponentially since the day we met. He’s always been so remarkably supportive and enthusiastic about anything I create, whether that’s a drawing on a napkin, a haphazard idea, or a completed work. His awe is so innocent and genuine, I feel a compulsion to believe in myself, to appreciate what I’m capable of. Whenever the self doubt creeps in, he’s the one to remind me of my spark. He has always seen me for me, and believed in me and what I can do full throttle. For every one of my “but what if…” he has the answer, for every “I don’t know…” he does know. I can’t thank him enough for what he has encouraged me to accomplish, he’s my number one fan and everything I make I dedicate to him.
What fear has held you back the most in your life?
Fear of failure. Fear of “all for nothing”. Fear of being invisible.
Art, or creating, is a really vulnerable career. I’m an emotional person, always have been. My heart goes on the page every single time.
There are a lot of people born with that ability to say “I don’t care what anybody thinks!” There have been a lot of times when I wish I had that.
I think the number one thing I still work to overcome to this day is “what if I put myself out there, and nobody cares?” or “nobody sees it” or “nobody likes it.”
I care SO much.
In a lot of ways I think this pushes me to put my all into the work itself, there’s a lot of soul in there! But you’ll find me hard-pressed to share it. Social media and networking scare me to bits! I’m shy, I always stand on the outer edges, I’m the outsider in the friend group, one foot out the door. I’m scared of getting hurt, I’m scared of being forgotten, not considered, I’m scare of a lot of things. Fear in general stops me from brazenly doing just about anything.
But I think I’m at a point, especially now as I said before about transitioning into making this my full-time career, that I’m exhausted from being scared. I have to try. It would be such a disservice to myself to let fear stop me. It’s time to give this my all, fear or no fear.
So a lot of these questions go deep, but if you are open to it, we’ve got a few more questions that we’d love to get your take on. What’s a belief you used to hold tightly but now think was naive or wrong?
That I had to be perfect before I could start my career! That’s part of the fears that held me back for so long I think. I thought my skills had to be top-tier, that my style had to be definitive and in place. That I had to have a huge portfolio of works using cohesive color and style. I never thought my skills were up to par, that there was no point in making this my career if I wasn’t on the same level as my favorite artists (you know, people who have been doing it for twice as long as me!)
But, turns out, none of that is true. My skills evolve with every piece I make. My style evolves the more I learn. I can’t believe it took me so long to start appreciating the journey as it happens. I was waiting for a finish line, I probably would’ve been waiting forever if I hadn’t started to believe in myself a little bit. Is my work perfect? Absolutely not. Are my skills top-tier? I don’t think so! BUT, I have clients who love what I’m doing, who have kept returning because they love the path and the growth as well! I feel nothing but ambition to keep pushing myself toward something greater while simultaneously appreciating where I am right now! It’s the best feeling, I’m really enjoying myself lately.
Before we go, we’d love to hear your thoughts on some longer-run, legacy type questions. When do you feel most at peace?
Easy, sketching! Before the piece gets big and scary, when the lines are loose and the shapes are flowing out of you. It feels like magic. There’s no obligation for it to look good, you feel free! The rawness of it is so special, and there’s nothing but you and the pen – everything else drifts away. I love that.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.palesile.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/palesile
Image Credits
None
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