Inevitably you will find yourself in a room where no one else is like you. They might not look like you, speak like you, pray or love like you or think like you. Managing to be effective in all contexts is an essential part of your journey towards reaching your full potential and so we asked some brilliant members of the community to share their stories and advice.

Angela Ying

I have often found myself as the only woman or minority in the workplace or at events and other situations, especially when I used to work in the music industry. Over the years, I’ve realized that staying true to yourself, not caring what others may think, and building your personal support circle is the key to being effective and successful, even if you are the only one in the room that looks like you. When you stop worrying about what everyone else around you may think and instead, focus on how to better yourself, that’s when you can be your best self and succeed. Success looks different to everyone, and you are the only one who can define what success looks like to you. Read more>>

Dr. Cheyenne Bryant

Whether, I’am the only one in the room that looks like me or not God gave me the address, so I belong there. With that level of faith and understanding how can one not be effective and successful. I show up confident in my expertise and purpose to deliver that at which I brought with me; wisdom, healing, love, and effective life changing tools. Read more>>

Katrina Hobbs Everett

My journey started with a pretty lonely path. Growing up in a predominately White community, in a small town (now city) there were not many people that looked like me and my family. I was the only student of color in my entire school from 2nd grade until 5th grade, and from kindergarten to 1st grade the only other kid of color that I recall was my sibling. I had mostly kind peers who welcomed me and I didn’t truly notice I was much different than any one else until 3rd grade. It was in 3rd grade that I had my first radicalized experience. Where I liked a boy and asked my friend to ask him out for me- and his response was that he could not date me because I was Black. While I did not understand at the time what that meant, I remember to this day how sad it made me feel. The first time I was called the n-word was that same year, by someone who I had previously considered a friend, and who was also my neighbor. Clearly I was different… I met my first non-white friend in 5th grade. The first person outside of my family that looked kind-of like me. She was much lighter, and her mother was White – but she had hair like mine and the moment we met an instant friendship was formed. We are still friends today, some 30 plus years later. Being the only brown student wasn’t the only way I stood out as a child. My father was a Pentecostal Minister and it seems everyone else was Catholic. My parents were also about 20 years older than my peers, my mom had me at 43 (number 10 of 13 children). To make matters worse, I was an extreme introvert with a boy-ish look and buck-teeth. I was extremely self-conscious, and I danced between being invisible and wishing to disappear most of the time. Read more>>

Ahmed “flex” Omar

Being the only one in the room who looks like you can feel isolating, but I’ve learned to view it as an opportunity rather than a challenge. Over the years, I’ve honed the ability to adapt quickly, understanding that my unique perspective is not just valid but essential. Read more>>

Klaudia Paletta

Being the only one in the room: how have you learned to be effective/successful even when you are the only one in the room that looks like you?

Being the only Latina in my yoga classes and teacher trainings has been a common experience for me. In these moments, it’s easy to feel like I don’t belong, but I’ve learned to center myself by coming back to my “why.” I remind myself why I’m passionate about sharing yoga and creating more inclusive spaces for Latinas. This purpose gives me strength and motivation to keep going, even when I’m the only one who looks like me in the room. Read more>>

Amber Collier

I think a lot of people suffer from feeling very small in a room full of people who do not look like them. That feeling of anxiety can be very daunting and quite frankly intimidating. I personally have learned over the years that most of us, if not all of us are trying to fit in somewhere in life at every interval of our existence, young and mature. We all are seeking to be seen, heard, appreciated and accepted and that is what has helped me to become successful and effective in rooms where I am the only person that looks like me. Life has essentially taught me that we are all seeking equivalency and reciprocity, and this has allowed me to become more comfortable and confident in my own skin. I can now take pride walking into a room and being the one who gets stares and whispers because I know I look unique and I love that about myself. Moreover, I know I possess the qualities to effectively communicate with anyone I come into contact with. I am also aware of what I can bring to the table in an environment that I have intentionally put myself in. Being an African-American woman with a very close-cut haircut and tattoos (all over my body including my face), I will always stand out in a crowd regardless of where I am. I think the most important part of this story is self-acceptance, self-awareness and self-love. If you are not in a space to love yourself unconditionally and be unapologetic about how you show up, you will never feel aligned with any community no matter the shape or size. Read more>>

Nidhi Shah

I am Nidhi, the unstoppable force behind Arni Fashion. My journey began with a fierce determination to rise above challenges and shatter barriers. Despite facing challenges and societal norms, I never let them define them With confidence and determination, I pursued my dreams, breaking barriers along the way and inspiring others to do the same. Read more>>

Larissa Rinaldi

When I got to New York City, I understood that creating a community was the best way to succeed, being the only one in the room.

From a young age, I was the different one. Imagine a lesbian going to a Catholic school in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. When I moved from, this feeling grew exponentially, but I was ready for the challenge! Read more>>

Margy Horowitz

For a very long time, I let society’s judgment about plus-size women affect how I felt about myself. I love living in Los Angeles, although it’s a place where a woman who is larger than a size 4 is ignored at best and vilified at worst. I also grew up in a family that put much more stock in a woman’s appearance than who she is on the inside and believed in the old (and outdated) adage that you have to be thin to be successful. It took me a long time, but I finally realized that beauty truly does come in all shapes and sizes! I have tremendous talents to offer and I now have the confidence to showcase my skills without worrying that someone is going to judge me negatively for my size. I learned to be effective and successful by ignoring those little voices inside me that whispered that I wasn’t good enough and instead focused on the positive aspects of my personality and talents. Read more>>

Nickey Boyf

I’ve learned to be effective in a room where I’m the only one that looks like me by having drive and perseverance. I realize that if I’m the only one in a room that looks like me, I need to make an impact that way those that come after me won’t deal with the same thing. Read more>>

Christin Collins

It took decades to understand the blessing it is to be in a room with a divergence of ideas and thinking instead of being surrounded only by look alike folks. The key became how to experience this from a place of openness, authenticity and vulnernability. Read more>>

Luciana Andrus

My journey began at a very young age. I was just four years old, living in a middle-class family in Brazil. My father worked as a bookstore manager, earning a decent income, while my mother stayed home to care for me. We were a loving, close-knit family. Read more>>

Don Belden

I’ve rarely found myself in rooms where everyone looks like me, but I’ve learned that having a solid strategy is crucial for success. Developing efficient habits allows me to complete tasks quicker and more effectively. My background in music, having been in bands on and off throughout my life, has taught me the importance of collaboration and adaptability. Read more>>

Yao Wen

Being the only one in the room that looks like me has been a challenging yet defining experience. As a young Asian female filmmaker, I’ve often felt my voice wasn’t heard or valued, which can be isolating and frustrating. Especially when English is not my native language, I have to put extra effort in speaking so my voice can be heard. Read more>>

Lisa Caldwell

Fortunately for the energetic and curious child that I was, I learned by doing and was encouraged to do so. Which worked some of the time for my parents, and may have been why I was placed into a Montessori school around 3 years of age. I had a lot of energy (still do) and it needed to be channeled. What better place than in an open- plan atmosphere where a kid could learn when they’re ready, on their own and in whatever way worked for them? This may have lent to the independence streak and motivation that I displayed at home, in school and among my peers. Read more>>

Lashanda Poteat

Being the only one in the room is intimidating to say the least. But while being the only one in the room I make sure I am seen first. My outfit choice is how I begin to be successful in a room that doesn’t look like me. Working in the craft beer industry it is known that brewers tend to be white males, beard, jeans/khaki’s and a brewery tee shirt that usually is from the brewery they brew at or a best bud to them that owns a brewery. Not me my outfits, always make me stand out even more then just being the only Female of Color. I’ve become known at most events now to have the cool earrings on, hair well maintained, well maintained nails and dressed in a way that makes others want to complement me and there a conversation begins. Read more>>

Dhwani Shah

If anything, it has helped me embrace my unique perspective. Confidence is key—I trust my voice and the value it adds. I also make it a point to find mentors and allies who get where I’m coming from, and I focus on building genuine relationships. Read more>>

Kelvin Louie

Leveraging my unique perspective, I’ve held leadership roles since I started working at 18. My experience running a tea house taught me valuable communication and team management skills. Being transparent with both my team and customers facilitated a smooth transition into a leadership role in real estate. I focused on supporting my team with a balance of tough love, understanding that people learn faster when challenged. Read more>>

Fran Vives

In my world, three concepts get the job done for me in being successful/effective. Perseverance, accepting yourself, and having fun. These three have to feel natural and spontaneous to get the best out of me. Learning how to deal and understand these three concepts is called “LIFE” acknowledging that, every process is different and special. For me, the term successful is about loving yourself. It’s easy to be hard on yourself because you are not achieving things that you think are succesulf for you especially when there is a lot to compare these days (social media). The goal of success is to love and accept yourself as you are. We are all unique and a single miracle. Read more>>

Dion’e Ka’eo

Being the only one in the room that looks like me can be both challenging and empowering. Over time, I’ve likely developed several strategies that have helped me thrive in these situations:

1. **Confidence and Self-Advocacy**

– I’ve learned to believe in my abilities and to advocate for myself, even when others may not fully understand or acknowledge my unique perspective. My self-confidence allows me to assert my ideas and opinions, knowing that my voice matters. Read more>>

Matthew Carter

Being the only one in the room that looks like me, or the only one in the room drawing focus, can be very intimidating if you let it. There are times I feel the anxiety of being the only one in the room when I first enter rooms like these, but I have learned how to center myself and focus on the positives. Read more>>

Grace Kim

As I reflect on my journey, I’ve come to understand that, in many ways, we are all alone—even when surrounded by family and friends. Our decisions, thoughts, and actions are deeply personal and ultimately our own, particularly as we grow older and our children become independent. Life teaches us that, at the core, we are individuals, navigating our paths with the strength of our convictions. Read more>>

Erina Wells

Living in the corporate realm for so long, I started to feel like there had to be a better way—a place for real growth, something beyond the confines of a cubicle and a computer screen for 8+ hours a day. So in 2022, I took a leap and left that world to pursue a journey of fulfillment. I had this deep desire to build something that could help others find peace in their human experience. Read more>>

Sarah Medley

As the proud member of a blended family with six wonderful children, each with their own unique needs, life has certainly thrown its share of challenges my way. In the past, I’ve been guilty of dismissing my struggles. While I felt like no one understood my situation, I was at the same time thinking that others have it much worse. But my experiences—like going through a challenging divorce and managing the complexities of our family life—are significant in their own right. Accepting that these experiences are part of me was the first step toward using them as a source of strength. Read more>>

Pam Harjo

I’ve learned to be successful by believing I’m capable even with voices from my past echo that I’m not. Through consistency and diligence I grew my skills and faith in myself. Its a circular practice. Believing you can is the first step. It gives you the strength to push through barriers. Perseverance develops and sharpens skills and those skills provide confidence, which in turn help you believe in yourself even more, and THAT is success! Being a single mom and a product of the foster care system, I might look different compared to others at the table, but I will not shrink to the corner. We all being value to the room. You have to own that, even on the hard days. Especially on the hard days. Read more>>

Makenna June

I heard somewhere the word “weird” has a German origin, “wyrd” which meant originally “having the power to control destiny.”

I always felt outcasted in my life. I was a golf professional before a tattoo artist/model and even before the tattoos I knew I was destined for more. As I started to trust my “wyrd” I felt myself opening up and trusting the process, and trusting myself enough to know that weird is special and there can always be more special in the world. Read more>>

Khush Patel

Being the only one in the room who looks like me has been a journey of growth and self-discovery. I’ve come to see it as an opportunity to amplify my unique perspective and experiences. Early on, I realized that instead of seeing this as a barrier, I could use it as a way to stand out and contribute something different and valuable. The values I learned from my family—like perseverance, integrity, and the belief that hard work pays off—have been my foundation. In those moments of feeling isolated, I remind myself that diversity of thought is crucial for innovation. My presence in the room isn’t just important for me; it’s vital for creating a richer, more inclusive dialogue. By embracing my uniqueness and understanding that it’s my strength, I’ve been able to turn challenges into opportunities, not just for myself, but for others who might feel the same way. Read more>>

Richard Tate

Growing up in a small town outside Eugene, Oregon, I was often the only one in the room who looked like me. As a biracial individual with a Black father and white mother, I was raised by my white mother and had no connection to my Black side or that culture. This left me in a unique position, where I wasn’t fully accepted by either side—my Black friends didn’t see me as Black enough, and I was never truly accepted as white by my white friends. Read more>>