Meet Laurelann Porter

We recently connected with Laurelann Porter and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Laurelann, thanks for sharing your insights with our community today. Part of your success, no doubt, is due to your work ethic and so we’d love if you could open up about where you got your work ethic from?

The question of where I got my work ethic is a bit complicated for me. It’s complicated because that work ethic stems from a belief system that I inherited that I find to be unhealthy for me. My parents were raised in the Great Depression, so they grew up in a time when there was so much poverty and people had to work very hard for their subsistence. In some ways I think we are living through a new kind of Depression. We didn’t have one financial event like the stock market crash of 1929 to hurls us into chaos. But workers’ rights have been eroded. The divide between rich and poor just keeps growing. Minimum wage is a joke. Capitalism appears to be grasping desperately for its right to exist while I see people leaving their daily grind to make a life for themselves on their own terms. That’s what I did, anyway.

In order to effectively answer this question I’ll highlight a song I recently wrote. It’s called “Bootstraps.” It’s a song I have dedicated to my father, because in many ways he taught us to pick ourselves up by our bootstraps. I just thought that was the normal and right way to do things. It wasn’t until I was an adult and in grad school that I began to sniff underneath that mantra and found something a bit stinky: the myth of rugged US individualism. It’s funny, when I was married, my ex-husband (who is Brazilian) used to complain about what a selfish American “individualista” I was. I didn’t really understand what kind of a dig that was supposed to be because I prided myself on being self-sufficient. I definitely got that from my dad. He told us over and over there were no free handouts in life. In fact sometimes when I was in grade school and would ask him for lunch money, he would say “What are you going to do for me?” My ten-year old self was shocked and indignant. In my mind I replied with great sass “I won’t starve, Dad!” But instead of sheepishly took the money, shamed for possibly not having earned it, the right to eat.

When my father passed away earlier this year I wanted to honor him with a new song. But I also didn’t want to romanticize or uncritically gulp down the beliefs he tried to instill in us. So I decided to take on this topic of the “Bootstraps” idea. I wanted it to be a way to acknowledge where my work ethic came from while also still acknowledging two key components to my new life and purpose: (1) as a recovering workaholic I have had to learn to be ok at times with doing nothing; and (2) I now have developed a new mantra: we only heal individually AND we only heal in community. It sounds like a paradox but both are true. We have to do our own work but we also cannot be expected to do it alone.

The motivation for writing this song came in the form of something I read recently that looked at the history of the phrase “Pick yourself up by your bootstraps.” Apparently when the phrase was coined, it was meant as sarcasm. It was a line in some physics textbook from the late 19th century that “Why can a man not lift himself up by his own bootstraps?” (Because an object cannot simply levitate all by itself). I just laughed. Isn’t it so like our world and culture and society to misinterpret and warp some quote from a different time period and, taken out of context, it develops an entirely new (and unhelpful) message?

Bootstraps (2024) Lyrics by Laurelann Porter, Music by Laurelann Porter and Mike Anderson

Pick yourself up by your bootstraps he told me.
You can’t rely on anyone but yourself.
He never told me it was an impossibility.
He just told me to do it myself.

Pick yourself by your bootstraps he told me.
But an object cannot simply levitate all by itself.
I never knew it was meant as sarcastic absurdity.
I just felt pressure to do it all by myself.

When I feel all alone like the world is at odds with me
And you use that phrase, as if there’s something wrong with me,
I feel a dark pit of shame and doubt
I can’t lift myself up without
Someone to share the burden with me

Bootstrap, bull crap all the way through it
Ain’t no justice in the phrase “just do it!”
Pick yourself up with the help of a friend
We can’t do it all by ourselves in the end.

Bootstraps…

Pick yourselves up by your bootstraps they tell you.
But that denies the very essence of our nature.
They never showed anyone how to do it for themselves.
They just walk away and laugh as we crack under pressure.

Pick yourself out of your bullshit, I tell you.
There’s a whole lot of ancestral baggage weighing you down.
I’ll never tell you that it’s going to be easy,
But I swear that rising up is better than falling down.

When you feel all alone like the world is at odds with you
And they use that phrase as if there’s something wrong with you,
Don’t fall into a pit of doubt.
You can’t life yourself up without
Someone to share the burden with you

Bootstrap, bull crap all the way through it
Ain’t no justice in the phrase “just do it!”
Pick yourself up with the help of a friend
We just can’t do it alone in the end

Bootstraps …

Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?

A friend of mine referred to me the other day as a “True modern day Renaissance being.” I was so honored by that comment because it confirms something I have long believed, contrary to most advice I’ve ever gotten. Most of my life people have told me “Do one thing and focus on it!” or “You’re too all over the place. Choose one thing and stick with it.” Even in marketing, we’re supposed to “niche down” to something really really specific. But that approach has never appealed to me. And yet – shamanic artistry is pretty damn niched down I would venture to guess. It certainly doesn’t exist in the IRS codes for registered business. (hahaha) So I think my company, Laurelann Porter Healing Services, LLC, is simply listed as “health & wellness” coaching, a very broad umbrella, indeed.

Even in high school I couldn’t choose between band or choir or drama or speech & debate or yearbook or … you get the idea. We were allowed exactly x number of electives per year and if you had interests outside of those spaces, well, you were just SOL. Somehow I found a way to do a bunch of stuff anyway and even graduate a year early from high school. I suppose those were the seeds of what would become a workaholic lifestyle from which I had to rescue myself, eventually. And in some ways, it was the culmination of my workaholic life (getting my PhD) that taught me the skills to pull myself up out of the workaholic mire I had created for myself.

I credit the influence of one of my mentors from graduate school, Dr. Amira de la Garza, who taught us a research method called critical autoethnography. I think she may have actually called it de-colonial critical autoethnographic methods or something like that. I remember that her approach was essentially using oneself as an object of inquiry to question, reflect, and critique upon the structures and systems from which we have inherited our habits and beliefs. This was something that resonated deeply with me. It stuck with me. And in some ways, not to sound overly dramatic, I think it kind of saved my life. Even when I took a medical leave of absence and had the support of a therapist, acupuncturist, rheumatologist, naturopath, and massage/energy worker, I still couldn’t have overcome the dark place I was in without the methods I learned in critical autoethnography. Those methods helped me to take a perspective of my life that was not unlike a “sacred witness” approach: I would observe my reality, my behaviors, and my symptoms, so that I could observe which strategies did or did not work well for helping me achieve a healthier life.

Apparently I was a very eager learner early on and I don’t think that has ever really shifted. Years ago I asked a former boss-turned-friend to write a letter of recommendation for me for some job application (or maybe it was an application for graduate school, I can’t remember). In his letter he said “Laurelann is such a questioner.” And he went on to explain how that was somehow so rare and special. I don’t think I had ever seen myself that way. But when I looked back at my life, I saw that I was, indeed, always a questioner. It was the primary reason I lost my religion at the age of about 15 or so. I had questions for my church that were not being answered to my satisfaction. And those questions were central to my understanding of what a religion was supposed to do and be. There was a hypocrisy that I saw at its core that I couldn’t resolve in my psyche. I think that is sort of how I have lived my life. I question things and question things and question things. And if I ever get down a line of questioning and reach a dead end where questions are not answered to my satisfaction, I just go somewhere else to find the answers to the questions I am posing. And of course, in the end, it is not the answers that are important, but the quest to seek those answers. The journey itself provides us with the wisdom we cannot find otherwise.

It was that journey through a dark place and out of it that led me to shamanism. It’s almost backward. I tell people all the time that shamanism changed my life. But if you really get to the bottom of the darkest place I was, it wasn’t actually the shamanism that saved me. It was my creativity and my critical autoethnographic methods. So I use those two components within my work as a healer and spiritual mentor. That’s why I call my mentoring program, Butterfly Bootcamp, a training program in shamanic artistry. Yes, I am training people to develop their skills in shamanic energy medicine as I learned them from the Four Winds Society, but additionally, I am providing skills in de-colonial self-reflexive practices and creative practices so they can become their own flavor of shamanic artists in their own lives and communities.

My areas of specialization have found me in such weird, unique ways as well, and seem to be sort of accidentally niched down. I specialize in grief – specifically a program I developed called “Creative Grieving” where we learn to use creativity in our grief processes, using 5 repeatable steps that I outline, and skills for developing creative ways to express the heavy emotions that are sometimes inexpressible in mere words. I have a Creative Grieving Self-Study Workbook available on Amazon. It was designed to go alongside as a companion to the Creative Grieving online course I have but it is also available on its own for folks who just need a little stimulus to start their own process on their own time.

I also specialize in dreams. I have trained in Dream Tending and Integral Deep Listening, but I also have the theatrical experience to stimulate folks to really dialogue with their dreams in ways that have surprising and enlightening results. It’s the work I will be promoting as a Vendor/Persona called “the Time Traveling Dream Oracle” that I’ll be marketing to Renaissance and other similarly-themed festivals around the country. I will use a variety of divination tools, including tarot and oracle decks, combined with elements from the various dream practices I’ve studied, to engage in dialogue with the figures form their dreams to give them insights about their past and/or their future. This is supported by skills in shamanic journeying as well so it should provide a meaningful mystical experience with little fanfare or need for technology.

And, as it turns out, apparently my singing voice has the ability to open portals. As it also turns out, I happen to be a powerful and comforting presence as an Ayahuasca companion. I’ve been told that when I sing during ceremony, angels come down to sing with me. I even named my Blues Band down in Brazil “Blue Angel.”

No, I do not personally lead Ayahuasca ceremonies. It is my personal belief that the medicine is best delivered by the indigenous peoples who have cultivated a sacred relationship with this plant medicine for generations. I am happy to accompany someone as I also have skills in integration for helping folks take the wisdom they received during ceremony and apply it to their daily lives to help realize their dreams and visions that came through.

If anyone is interested in exploring the idea of training with me in shamanic artistry, please reach out. The mentoring program, Butterfly Bootcamp, has its next cohort in October. I’m already accepting calls for interested applicants. For a program like this it’s important for us to have a 1:1 call to see if we are a good match at this time for this work. The Shamanic path is not a path that one should undertake lightly. Entering the Medicine Wheel asks us to shed ourselves of our past, all those things no longer serving us. And sometimes, the very things preventing us from growing and realizing our dreams, are the things in our past that we cling to so desperately. This work requires being willing to be vulnerable. I want to make sure you know who to turn to if the vulnerability gets to be too intense, and that you have a supportive team of people who you can call upon while you move through the Medicine Wheel. In my case, I had all those I listed: my therapist, acupuncturist, naturopath, etc. It’s not healthy for you to have only one person guiding your health and wellness journey. The more people you have on your team, the better support structure you have for facing life’s challenges confidently. Please don’t take my word for it. Ask someone you trust.

Take a listen to my music on whatever streaming platform you use. My album “Soul Journeying” was created with healing energy imbued into the tracks. Let me know how the music resonates with you.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

I would say that dedication to being a questioner is extremely important to how I’ve developed as a person. Be willing to ask questions. Be willing to ask deeply probing questions. And be willing to ask yourself questions. When we ask ourselves the deepest and most important questions we have to be willing to listen to the answers that come through. Being able to be a questioner also leads to being a lifelong learner. This is an attribute I would never change about myself. This also leads to the idea that the quest is what makes the journey. And the quest comes from asking interesting questions that actually matter to you.

Creativity is key to everything. It has saved me on multiple occasions from very dark places. Being able to develop the ability to express, creatively, all manner of experiences I’ve had … has allowed me to feel more empowered. Even the most painful or most baffling experiences can continue to make themselves known in deeper ways when the creative expression is allowed to blossom. I can’t tell you the number of times I have written a song and not realized its deeper meaning until months or even years later. It’s as if sometimes the songs are channeled by some consciousness outside of myself. Sometimes I’ll even look back at a song and not have any memory of coming up with that particular melody or chord progression. When they come through they come through rather lightning quickly. It takes a while sometimes to develop them to their full potential but the seed spark usually comes through in a bit of a frenzy. It wasn’t always that way. And I’m not even sure when I went from “It takes me months to write a song” to writing nearly a song a day at one point. But I do believe that my own healing process has been central to the ability to be prolific at being a songwriter. Twice this year I challenged myself to write a song in less than a week and it was no problem. It just takes intention and imagination. These are two very powerful skills in both the arts and in shamanism. And many of my songs come from shamanic healing processes. So the music itself has healing energy embedded at its very core.

Lastly, I would say, don’t let anyone tell you what you can or can’t do. This is especially true right now in the age we’re living. In some ways, I still think the world’s systems and structures are collapsing. But it doesn’t send me into an existential death spiral now. Now I look at everything happening in the world and I try to be grateful that the most grotesque and egregious hypocrisies are being exposed. I see more and more people choosing to craft lives for themselves outside of the 9-5 job (which usually ends up being an 80 hour a week job if you want to “succeed” according to the parameters we’ve been given). Several years ago when I was still a college professor I actually sort of poo-pooed the degree in Entrepreneurial Business that was beginning to become so popular. And now, here I am. I probably could have benefitted from sitting in on some of those classes! hahaha. But mostly I just believe that our systems of value exchange are shifting and transforming. I hear people say “Stop trading hours for dollars!” And I hear people say that this is the information age where data is the most prized commodity. I also believe that very soon humanity is going to realize, at its very core, that when we work for the well-being of all, and that means ALL, then we all benefit from it. It sounds so obvious when I say it out loud or write it in a sentence. When we work for the well-being of all, we are “more well” as a result.

One of our goals is to help like-minded folks with similar goals connect and so before we go we want to ask if you are looking to partner or collab with others – and if so, what would make the ideal collaborator or partner?

I love this question. I have been feeling increasingly called to foster collaborative projects in my life. It goes back to my belief that we only heal and community and we only heal alone. I also know that as a “Renaissance” being I can’t do everything myself.

I’m always looking for creative collaborators. If you are a musician, especially someone who knows both the Blues and some of the basics of Brazilian music & rhythms, I would love to chat. We will also likely be looking for folks to help support make a few music videos in the next 12 months. If your skills are in animation, costume design, or production design and you’d like to collaborate, please reach out laurelann@rhythmandflavor.com

If you are a music promotor or booking agent, I’d really love to chat. I would especially be interested in finding someone who could help resolve some of the challenges of being a solo artist (finding touring musicians, finding for example). I’d also love to make connections to folks who can help my music reach a broader audience.

One important aspect to my work as a songwriter is to have some objective ears listening to the songs to help me discern how they are being received by other folks. So I’m looking to put together a “vetting group” of people who enjoy music, especially those who enjoy listening to new music. Bonus points if you actually watch TV and movies because part of the objective is to get our music licensed for use in film and television to help boost our diversity of income streams. In order to most effectively do this, we generally need to have a good idea, in a few short words, (1) what other bands, musicians, or projects does this song sound like, (2) in what current TV shows could you imagine this song supporting, and (3) what descriptors would you use to describe mood/tone/etc. There is also going to be a need for the folks in the vetting group who also enjoy being part of the creative process, to answer questions about how a song-in-progress is coming across. If any of that interests you, please reach out to laurelann@rhythmandflavor.com and let me know. I’d love to gather this team of listeners by the end of the summer.

In the healing arts realm I would be very interested in talking to retreat organizers who might be looking for a resident shamanic artist to make their retreats especially transformational. I can lead retreats for small groups in dreams, shamanism, creativity, and/or grief (or any combination thereof). Once again, reach out to laurelann@rhythmandflavor.com

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Image Credits

Libby Danforth

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