Every day, our team is focused on how to help our audience and community reach their full potential in every part of their lives – personal and professional. Building confidence and self-esteem is one of the most essential requirements for success and below we’ve presented some of the conversations we’ve had around how to build confidence.
David Stecher
Self-esteem is an up and down in life. First there was the phase, where I did not know enough, so I studied what I am doing now. Then I entered phase 2, I got a strong self esteem, maybe even a little too much, but it helped me feeling secure in what I was doing. After phase 2 I realised, that it is not healthy to be a too-much self confidend person and there were some jobs, that really challenged me and reached my limits and beyond. So I had to learn, that you never know everything – and that is really ok. I try to use these moments to learn something new. Right now I would say that I am thankful that I can do what I do, I try to help with my knowledge and experience but also know that you never can know it all. It is also OK if a job is going just OK. As long as I gave all I had, there is nothing that I can blame myself for. Read more>>
Skylar Hunter
In the beginning of my junior year of high school, I suffered a very painful heartbreak. At the time, I did not know my worth and was willing to settle for the potential of someone. Soon after, I spent months with fluctuating emotions, attempting to be friends with someone who would never feel the same way about or appreciate me. One day, I decided to let go. I allowed myself to prioritize what was best for my mental health rather than other people’s perceptions of me and ended this friendship. I also preceded to end another unhealthy friendship in my life. This time was a transitional period for me. For a large part of my life, I had become accustomed to people asking all over me and having low self esteem. But after falling down a rabbit hole of self love content and becoming sick and tired of being sick and tired, I decided to change my outlook on life. I slowly took the necessary steps to be more intentional towards showing love to myself. Whenever I looked into the mirror and felt a lack of confidence surrounding my physical appearance, I asked myself, “What if there is nothing wrong with me?” I also continued attending therapy and dismantling the idea that other people’s needs are more important than my own. Read more>>
Kieara Francis
To be honest, you don’t. At least not at first. It’s extremely hard to be confident at something that is totally new to you, especially if you’re a content creator like myself and need to share it with the world. It’s so scary but, it’s about knowing your vision and having the courage to say that no matter what happens, you’re going to keep pushing until you achieve your goals. Courage, patience and perseverance is the key. Read more>>
Allegra DiNardo
I think developing confidence and self-esteem has taken me years. I personally think you as an individual are always growing with confidence through every obstacle life has thrown at me. I have always been an extravert so self-esteem and confidence has always come a little easier for me to handle. I work in a predominately male industry and that has forced me to not only have thick skin but strong skin. I grew up working in kitchens surrounded by strong ego willed chefs that forced me to have confidence in my product and dish or I would be fired. It allowed me to grow into a strong willed female who can now walk into a room full of men and feel confident I too belong to be in the room. Read more>>
Raven Kee
Confidence and self-esteem we have an interesting relationship, it’s so up-and-down sometimes but I’m getting it to be more consistent. I really struggled with a positive view of myself pretty much all my life, I wouldn’t say it started to get more consistently better until I hit my late 20s and I’m 31 now. I’m so much more kinder to myself, I speak positive affirmations over me and remind myself that I am strong and capable. I wouldn’t even know how to begin to describe at what point self doubt started manifesting within me, but in my head I always found myself lacking. My mom and family were very good at nurturing confidence and self-esteem, but I think it was more so my environment. We grew up in a tough area of dc, kids were going through a lot and the way to unleash that was to be mean to those around them. I was the soft spoken shy girl, I had a friend group but it was small and we were goofy and our interests didn’t quite fit in with the majority. But looking back on all of that now I’m just so grateful for my partner & friends that I have and the community that I built for myself. And they also speak kind words of affirmations into me and help build me up, but I also had to put the work in to actually believe the words. Read more>>
LaTonia Walker
I developed my personal confidence and self-esteem from a few ways: 1)God. My faith is very important to me. I have confidence because I know who God says I am. Knowing that I have His love and also His favor gives me the ultimate confidence. 2)Healing. We all have faced our personal degree of trauma and challenging life experiences. I took the initiative to work on my issues, and still am. I dealt with the major trauma of my past. Then used those challenges to step into my purpose. So many people are walking around hurt and operating out of trauma. Part of building your self-esteem is dealing with the ugly stuff, then let your true inner and outer beauty prevail.3)Personal style. Now that I discussed the inner work, lets touch on the external. I found my own personal style and I wear it boldly. I will never be the American standard of beauty, but I am my own standard of beauty! I believe in playing up to your strength. I know the areas that I like about my body and I highlight those. The areas you don’t like, if you can do something about it, do it! I do believe in plastic surgery by the way. Chile get that area fixed and move on LOL If it is something you can’t fix, then accept your flaws, we all have them. Also, I do not try to be like other people. I can appreciate their style without trying to make it my own. I am more natural. Read more>>
Arnie & Debby Johnston
DEBBY: First, I have to honor my parents, Richard and Helen Percy, who loved and believed in me and my two brothers, Rick and Lee. Everything I chose to do, they supported and believed was the right thing to do. ARNIE: My parents, too–James and Eliza Johnston–were instrumental in starting me on life as an adventure by emigrating from Scotland when I was nine. That forced me to learn new things whether I wanted to or not, and to discover inner resources I might not have found otherwise. DEBBY: My parents and teachers instilled in me the belief that I had to honor my talent with practice and hard work. Flaubert said to de Maupassant, “My young friend, you must work harder than you do.” And that, too, has guided me. ARNIE: Teaching myself an American accent opened my eyes to the wonder of different voices, as well as confirming for me the value of technique and practice. The illusionist’s devotion to both allows the audience to believe in magic. Read more>>
Emily Imbrogna
Confidence is something I may be forever working on. It hasn’t come naturally to me, especially since I was only recently diagnosed with ADHD, and the condition, for me, comes with something called “rejection sensitivity dysphoria”. As an artist and business owner with lofty goals, I must prioritize building and maintaining an internal sense of confidence to sustain my motivation, creative output, and continuous momentum toward progress. As an artist, I find that my inspiration comes from a variety of sources. For example, I’m fascinated with etymology and words. “Confidence” stems from roots meaning “with faith.” The biggest lesson I’ve learned is that it’s the “doing” that leads to confidence, regardless of the outcome – “doing” “with faith” – The more I push myself out of my comfort zone by doing and trying new things, the more belief I have in my own capabilities. Hitting emotional rock bottom and rising from the ashes has taught me that recovery from failures instills a sense of safety. I know I can endure discomfort for the sake of my success and happiness because failure is not the same as defeat. Read more>>
Romi Wallach
Mental toughness is something that has been ingrained in me my entire life. And while I have experienced my fair share of challenges, traumas and obstacles, giving up or being a victim was never an option. But what really did catapult me to where I am at today was my experience in the Crossing for Cystic Fibrosis. In 2021, I was told about this fundraising event where 200 participants cross the Ocean, from Bimini Bahamas to Lake Worth Florida (80 miles), on a paddle board to raise money and awareness for the Piper’s Angels Foundation. I have always had a passion for philanthropy, also something that was a core value in my family. When I learned that I could combine a physical challenge, specifically SUP which was a new and favorite past time of mine, with an opportunity to do good for others, I didnt even ask questions. Read more>>
Jared Caleb
I used to think that self-esteem and confidence came from those around you. The way you presented yourself, the way you dressed, spoke, acted… it was their reactions that validated who I thought I was. After a lot of self-reflection and introspective moments, I realized that it actually came from within. No one else is in control of how you feel about yourself- just you! I no longer get up and get dressed to impress, I get up and get dressed to be impressed. Read more>>
Sebastian Montenegro Tamayo
When I was a little kid I used to be afraid of everything, I was not very social, and I rarely volunteered for anything, until I was a little older, around 10 years old.. My grandmother had a huge influence on that aspect, I call her Tata. My Tata always said that no matter where I am or who I am with, there will be nothing more pleasing than seeing someone so confident because that automatically makes your peers confident, not cocky, confident, and respectful. On the other hand I had may parents who always supported me and never turned me down, especially when I said to them that I wanted to be an actor, they were super supportive, my dad even told me, “I don’t care what you choose to do in life as long as it makes you happy and it gives you purpose, whatever you choose just be the best you can be.” Having this kind of mentality growing up also developed my willingness and eagerness to go beyond! I am a Colombian guy who loves acting, an immigrant that has known how to overcome certain challenges like being outside of my home country for almost a decade now. It is important to know who you surround yourself with, there are a lot of people complaining and always carrying a negative mindset, I always avoided those circles, I surrounded with people that made me better as an artist and that motivated me by watching their work ethic, because in the end all that matters is `who can I learn from, and who can I grow with as an artist. Read more>>
Jasmine Virginia
Through showing up to the practice of creating and persevering through the fear and the doubt that is always a constant voice wanting to hold me back from showing my work, I’ve been able to gain more confidence and self esteem. In my experience self esteem come from simply doing that which you are scared to do. Often times in the artists case it’s putting your art or music, both of which are an expression of the soul, out into the public spehre where it will be judged that holds us back. Our perceived fear of the pain that will come with negative feedback or experience can hold us back for lifetimes, when we actually just have to walk through the fear. We have to step onto the stage when we are scared to sing in front of others, we have to show people our paintings when we are worried about critical feedback of it, we have to reach out to secure opportunities to showcase our talents when we will inevitably get ‘No’s’ and ‘not right now’s’, we have to perform a bad show, we have to cry and laugh and learn from all of these experiences and release our own attachments to our desired outcome and simply observe the process of going through the motions of gaining….experience. The not so great show, or not getting sales, getting negative feedback is the process we walk on the way to our success and there is no way around it. In my experience it’s only through the doing that we are able gain confidence to do it again, and again and again not matter the perceived positive or negative outcome. Read more>>
Daniel Forster
In a world of creatives vying for everyone’s attention, it is ironic that a lot of my early attention was because of my bad work. I didn’t start out taking photos for attention, but when I learned some people were enjoying my work, I started sharing it with a broader audience. That is when the negative attention also appeared. I could have let the negative words get me down, but I remember that I made some very distinct decisions at that point. I wasn’t going to stop taking and sharing photos, but I also wasn’t going to let the haters get to me. First, I tried to evaluate if the person had a valid point or critique that I could use to make my work better. Like maybe the photo wasn’t as sharp as it could be, and people were saying it’s blurry. That is feedback I could use for improvement in the future. However, many times people would just be rude and toxic with their words online. At that point, I realized that some people are upset for reasons outside of my control and I just ignored them. I feel that by powering through these kinds of situations I was able to keep learning and growing in my craft. I was also able to continue to share my work and get good feedback that helped me build confidence that I was doing something that I appreciated and that many others did as well. Read more>>
Katie Lee
Confidence is created. It is not something that someone is born with or magically possesses. This is the best news ever because it means that anyone can become confident, regardless of what they have experienced or where they currently find themselves in life. This was my story. I found myself smack dab in the middle of a sudden divorce from a marriage that I fought for fifteen years to save. While I had thought I was confident, I discovered that my confidence and self-esteem had plummeted and this downward spiral began to affect every aspect of my life: physically, emotionally, mentally, financially and spiritually. Divorce is not a season where you want your confidence and self-esteem to diminish, but where it serves you to show up confidently so you can prepare for the next chapter of your life. About six months into my divorce process, I made a powerful decision that I was going to become the most confident version of myself that I had ever been. The Latin root word for the word confidence is confidere, which means “to put trust in”. I discovered that the source of my problem was also my clear solution. My confidence had plummeted not because of what my soon to be ex husband did or did not to me, but because I had lost trust in myself and my ability to follow through with me. Once I made this mindset shift, my life began to change very quickly. Here is what that process looked like: Read more>>
Bri Pottle
I think developing my confidence and self-esteem started when I moved cross country from Portland, ME to Portland, OR. I really got to experience a whole new life and reinvent myself. Coming from central Maine I didn’t really have much exposure to anything worldy, so Portland, OR was a really great place to start. That was when I had my first experience with booth renting a chair at a salon. I started to learn more skills with having my own business, I did a lot of booking clients for myself, started doing my taxes differently, and made my own hours. Once I got a taste of making my own hours there was no going back from that. When you work for yourself you learn a lot about boundaries, holding yourself accountable, and how to speak up for yourself when needed. When moving to Portland, OR, that was also my first experience of going to therapy. I have a lot of family trauma that was pretty bottled up, and it needed to come out. Through talk therapy, I got through a lot of what I needed to at that time and that’s when my confidence really started to peak through. I was taught that I don’t have to let life just happen to me, but I can have better experiences and outcomes. The healing process is slow and hard, but it has been very worth it. Read more>>
Jocelyn R.C.
I think early on, throughout childhood into early adulthood, my confidence was so closely tied to the feeling of safety. And since I spent most of my time at school and at home, those were key environments in which my own baseline of self-esteem was formed. I have this vivid memory from 7th grade science class (circa 2001), when one day our teacher asked us a question, and nobody raised their hand. We were, for the most part, all paying attention, but nobody knew the answer. We looked around. No hands. Our teacher looked around and said, “Someone answer. Take a guess. You won’t be wrong, just try. Whatever you say, I’ll make it right.” I had the privilege of growing up with encouraging teachers and parents who nurtured a healthy and foundational confidence with which I eventually set out into the world. Very grateful for this. For me nowadays, confidence first starts with the simple desire to do a good job–to be good at something, maybe even to be great at it. And how do I become good at something? Practice. This involves a repeating cycle of trying things, making mistakes, implementing new learnings, etc. The confidence I have in my current work is a result of committing myself to this cycle for 15+ years (and counting) on/in a variety of projects, teams, and work cultures. Each project brings new challenges and learnings, both regarding the work itself as well as my own performance and part in its process. Self-assessment is a big part of my practice and helps drive the overarching pursuit for improvement and experimentation. Read more>>
Mattea Williams
One of the most uplifting discoveries that helped me in my career was realizing that I had confidence and self esteem all a long. I just had to get out of my own way in order to see it. It’s easy to compare ourselves, and think and feel negatively, so I would say step one is to change your language in order to change your perspective. Language is very powerful and so are our thoughts. One day, I wrote a concert band piece that I was really proud of, and I told myself out loud “wow, I’m really proud of how this turned out! This music is magical!” When I started changing my language and celebrating my successes the way a best friend would, confidence and self esteem came easily. If you’re also an artist, you can do the following two exercises. Number 1: Separate the artist from the art; you are not your art but rather your art is an expression that you and ONLY you have the power to manifest for others to experience in the way that you do because you are the only person who sees the world through your specific lens. Your individuality and thoughts are your super power and comparison is its kryptonite. Be sure to remember that even if a piece of art doesn’t turn out the way you planned, or you miss an opportunity, there are SO MANY other things that make you, you and you deserve to be confident regardless. Simply by nature of being, just like everyone else in your field. Read more>>
B Ah Leader
I really built my confidence from my parents instilling in me (from a young age), that i can be or do anything i put my mind to. I also believed that if i can see it in my head that it is achievable! So anything i do i do to the best of my abilities and them some. Music is my passion, my job , my oxygen, i live it and won’t stop until i master my craft. Read more>>
Ryan ‘King Vee’ Stull
Developing confidence and self esteem came naturally but it was a gradual process, I remember when I was in school especially the early years I was very very very shy, almost said no words, now as I started to move towards the end of middle school by this time I got into a couple scuffles and won, that builds confidence, being biracial during that time came with some trials, I had to defend myself often. As I started to get into high school I sorta shelled up again because it was a new environment and since I went to a private school in middle school, there were significantly more students, I think my success in sports, and having girls flirt with me helped build my confidence and self esteem then, fast forward to my adult life now, it’s my listeners, it’s my supporters, they reinforce me, my faith through god reinforces my confidence and self esteem, plus you don’t have to worry about others acceptance if you’re just being you. Only god can judge you. Read more>>
Brian Herskowitz
Somewhere back in the dark ages, before the internet, I had decided to become an actor. I started out doing theater and then film. In 1978, I moved to Hollywood, where I have been an actor, a writer, a producer, and a director. I think most people would agree that you have to have self-confidence and self-esteem to be in the entertainment business. I certainly believe that to be true. Even though I started studying as a small child. I was nine, and I was small. And I had my first paid dinner theater gig at eleven; that’s not where my confidence and self-esteem came from. For that, we have to go back a few more years. When I was six, my older brother, who was seven at that time, was diagnosed with dyslexia. The eye doctor recommended that he start a sports program that would help develop his eye-hand coordination. He suggested boxing, karate, or judo. Jew-what? Never heard of it. It just so happened that there was a judo tournament taking place that weekend, and we went and watched. It was love at first sight. We returned home, threw some pillows on the ground, and beat the hell out of each other. Well, I was mostly on the losing end of that. Read more>>
Nedy Johnson
I’ve learned that confidence isn’t a state-of-being, it’s an emotion. And just like all emotions, it comes and goes in waves. It’s not so much that I’m perpetually confident, but as long as you don’t tell people you’re nervous, they will have absolutely no idea. For instance, I recently played a cover of Amy Winehouse’s “Valerie” at the Hopvine Pub open mic in Seattle, WA. One of my friends (who has seen me perform numerous times) was flabbergasted the moment I sang, “Well, sometimes…” Meanwhile, by the middle of the song, the entire bar was enthralled, singing and dancing along to the tune. The problem is: I’m not the most proficient guitar player. Not only had I only started strumming with a pick the month prior, I had only learned the chords to the song within the previous two days. I was so focused on the pick that I almost forgot to enjoy the crescendo of voices as they all came together. However, I did find a brief moment to stop worrying and just be present. And by the final two lines, I gave up on the pick altogether; letting it fall out of my hands. Everyone was so enraptured (and I was able to do it on beat) that nobody. However, unlike confidence, self-esteem is a state-of-being. And I’ve developed mine through continual self-improvement: investing in my mental resilience, my talent, my hobbies, my relationships with friends and community. A healthy level of self-esteem is only able to emerge when you have a solid personal foundation. So prioritizing your needs and investing in your wants is a crucial aspect of a healthy mental and physical lifestyle. Read more>>
Kimberly Miller
I wrote in an earlier article that I wanted to take many different trainings to be more client centered instead of fearful and ego-centeric and hopefully do research, but I was thinking a lot about what I stand for. I discovered a deeper quest that I am on -that is not so cognitive. I have a deep commitment to living from the inside out and not the other way around. Finding self-worth has been my most special and important journey. I realized there is a part of all of us that is unbreakable. Trauma and stress can twist us and create defense mechanisms but there is a part of self -worth and that inner knowing is always there and that is where I draw my self worth from. It takes work to get there and listen and even change the things in your life that do not fit. I believe this now as like a conviction. I think many different theories have noticed this phenomenon. And seems to be called many different things. But I believe it has always been there. I always ask myself “I am aligning with my purpose or am I afraid?” I try to no longer abandon myself which is easy to do in our complicated world. I love teaching this to clients. Read more>>
Jessi Moyler
I feel like I had no choice. I enjoy being the odd ball. My style and how I present myself is different and often that draws attention towards me. So it’s just something I have to have. I love coloring my hair and I love my piercings and my tattoos so I have to keep the confidence up to because that’s what makes my style truly Read more>>
Alyssa Hatchard
One of the first steps was engaging in deep self-reflection. By understanding my strengths, values, and areas for growth, I began to see myself more clearly and appreciate my unique qualities. Journaling, meditation, and honest self-assessment have been essential tools in this process. I learned to view challenges and setbacks as opportunities for growth rather than failures. Facing and overcoming obstacles allowed me to build resilience and confidence in my ability to handle difficult situations. Each success, no matter how small, reinforced my belief in myself and my capabilities. Surrounding myself with supportive and encouraging individuals played a crucial role. Positive reinforcement from mentors, friends, and colleagues helped me recognize and build on my strengths. Building a network of people who uplift and believe in you can be incredibly empowering. Investing in personal and professional development has been instrumental. Whether through courses, coaching, or reading, continually learning and expanding my knowledge base has boosted my confidence. The more skilled and knowledgeable I became, the more self-assured I felt Lastly, learning to be kind to myself, especially during times of self-doubt or failure, was crucial. Self-compassion involves treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer a friend. This shift in mindset helped me to embrace my imperfections and maintain a positive self-image. Read more>>
Pauline Cornu-Labat
I developed my confidence and self-esteem by committing to understanding myself. I shut out the noise and opinions of others for a while, becoming deeply curious about my own likes and interests without considering what others thought. When I discovered all the intricacies of myself—what I liked and disliked, my opinions on certain topics, my favorite activities, and what truly brought me joy—that’s when I found my authenticity. My authenticity is unique to me. No one can duplicate me, and I can’t try to become someone I’m not just because I admire them or think they are more “worthy” than I am. We are all worthy, especially when we are true to ourselves. Authenticity allows you to escape all competition. As I became more authentic, my confidence and self-esteem naturally emerged. Read more>>
