It’s okay to be scared, often that’s a sign that you are pushing yourself towards greatness. However, it’s equally important to build up your confidence and we hope the conversations presented below can help provide some food for thought around how you can level up your confidence and self-esteem.
Sienna China
I wasn’t always confident, growing up I never felt as pretty as the other girls. I want my hair as straight as theirs, I want the same clothes they had, I wanted to be like the other girls and this was before social media too. The only time I felt pretty was when my dad would tell me I was pretty, I grew to feel ugly and criticize myself constantly. Around 2022 was when my confidence started to slowly grow and I started feeling more confident about myself. I would get called names growing up and teased because of how I dressed and what my hair looked like. I had to learn to love myself and adjusted my appearance to the way I love myself for me and not let others effect me. My dad told me that “People tease you to make themselves feel better at night” which is true because I learned that some people aren’t happy with themselves to where they take it out others. Read more>>
Matt Heltzel
I grew up with what psychologists sometimes refer to as “internalized shame.” Unlike guilt, which says “I did something bad,” the messaging I internalized was “I am bad.”
I battled with that for the first 25 years of life, until I discovered Brene Brown’s ted talks about shame and vulnerability. Through her ted talks and a few years of therapy, I began to build a sense of self-esteem and confidence in myself. Mostly, I discovered that “I wasn’t bad,” but in fact I had lots to give the world. That transformation ultimately led me to starting Moxie. Read more>>
Joy Villa
Interviewer: Joy, you’re known for your incredible confidence and vibrant energy. Can you share how you developed your self-esteem over the years? Was it always natural for you, or was it a journey?
Joy Villa: That’s such a great question! Self-esteem has definitely been a journey for me—it wasn’t always natural. Growing up as a mixed-race minister’s daughter, I often felt like I didn’t quite belong, especially since I was balancing so many different parts of my identity. I had to learn that my uniqueness was my strength. Read more>>
Amanda Howell Whitehurst
It’s easy to compare yourself to other artists, and I’ve definitely fallen into that trap during my artistic journey. Over time, I had to shift my perspective and ask myself important questions: What did I want to achieve in my art? How did I want people to recognize my work as uniquely mine? What style did I want to be known for? These reflections helped me focus on developing my own voice as an artist. Read more>>
Ashlee Dill
My self-esteem development first started off a bit rocky. Growing up, I absolutely hated my curly hair. My confidence dwindled every-time I saw magazines with long straight hair or girls in public school having the “easiest hair” to style, while my hair took hours to wash, detangle, and style through because I had so much of it. Commercials for gadgets with straightened hair, constantly being told my curls looked “unkept”, frizzy, and “nappy”, and even being pressured to get a perm or relaxer just so my hair would look “prettier” weighed down on my self-esteem. I looked in the mirror one day and decided not to listen to what others said anymore, because it didn’t define me or the crown of curls I wear everyday that I was blessed with. I soon learned that hair care is self-care, and despite what others have commented about my hair over the years, it would never again stop me from loving my curls as much as I love myself. I now use my story to encourage others to love the hair they were born with, as it is a crown of beauty. “Curlfidence” is confidence! Read more>>
Aniya Powell
I developed my confidence and self-esteem through a passion for doing nails that began when I was 9. I taught myself by using kits like Kiss nails and refining my skills. Words of encouragement from peers at school, who admired my work. my belief in my abilities and inspired me to continue and as I grow to Pursue a future nail career. Read more>>
Holly Schultz
Many of us look at others who exude confidence and assume they’ve always been that way, but confidence is often built, not born. When I was younger, I struggled with being incredibly self-conscious. I was so worried about saying the wrong thing or not being liked that I avoided speaking up altogether. It was a part of myself I knew I wanted to change because it held me back from truly living and connecting with others. Read more>>
Kalima Grair
Building my confidence and self-esteem has been a journey shaped by both struggles and determination. When I got licensed in May 2023, I was passionate about real estate, but I quickly realized how isolating it could feel without guidance. I had no one to turn to, no clear direction, and I began questioning if I was capable of succeeding. It was a low point, but it also became a turning point. Read more>>
Maggie Caroline
“If it scares you, then you have to do it.” Sitting at a bar in Chicago, nursing my water, feeling shy and quietly waiting for my boyfriend to be ready to leave, a friend of his approached me. She started talking about how it was living in Chicago (she, my boyfriend, and I were all Kentucky natives) and said she moved here because the idea scared her. “I just think, ‘if it scares me, then I HAVE to do it!’” It may be cliche, but this girl in a bar truly changed my life. I moved to Chicago (scary), I became a model (scary), a kind-of-friend from college and I started a business together (scary) in an arena I had no experience in (scary), I’ve auditioned for things I didn’t feel qualified for (scary) and then I got them (terrifying). Whenever I feel hesitant to put myself out there – which, as a freelance artist for a living, is ESSENTIAL – I think about how cool my life got after I stopped avoiding what scared me and played comfortable where I knew I’d succeed. Read more>>
Danielle Ford
Confidence and self-esteem are something that I continue to work on everyday and will for the rest of my life. When I was younger I had high anxiety and was well known for being the girl in the back of the classroom who only spoke when the teacher spoke to me. I cared too much of what others thought of me and that hindered my growth in so many areas. Once I found something I was truly passionate about I was able to let go of that way of. thinking. It took time but I was able to focus on my passion and through that passion build my confidence and self esteem. I was also able to use that passion to push me to live in Japan for two years. During that time I taught English and had no choice but to get over my anxiety and be in-front of classes of up to 36 students. That truly changed my life. I also learned through their kindness that I am ok just for who I am and I need not worry about what others think of me or what others consider success. Success will be different for everyone. Now that I have overcome that anxiety I am able to meet so many people and grow as a person, I am so thankful for that experience. Read more>>
Nigel Roxbury
It took a long time. I think as someone who’s been fairly nomadic as a child and adult (Lived in Los Angeles & Austin as a child), went to school at Ithaca College where I knew no one, came to NYC where I knew very few people, you have to be very open to meeting new people and enter any social situation with positivity and kindness. I think the latter is most important in confidence really. If you are positive, kind and open to new experience and individuals, confidence will radiate off you and show. The more you do that, the better your self-esteem will be as well because you will feel connected with more people. Read more>>
Stephanie Berwick
My confidence and self-esteem took shape through a combination of education, professional experience, and a commitment to understanding people. Early in my career, pursuing an MBA was a big goal as I have always valued education. This educational foundation gave me the confidence to tackle challenges and problem solve from an analytical perspective. Honestly, it even gave me the confidence to take on challenges and various calculated risks that allowed me to develop those problem-solving skills. Read more>>
Malachi Maisha
I am now my biggest supporter. At one point in my life, I looked for encouragement from others. When I fell short of receiving that it broke my spirit. Now I survive off my affirmations. I must say getting to that point is an honor for my soul. I spent years fighting depression. Which almost took my life a few times. Now I control the narrative that I am always needed and good enough. Inner meditation, prayer, and action will give you your POWER back. Read more>>
Liana Kurogi
Confidence and self-esteem have been lifelong lessons for me. My first professional stage performance was when I was 10 years old in Japan. I was thrilled but also terrified—I had never faced such high expectations before. The year-long audition and rehearsal process was grueling, and stepping onto that stage for the first time felt like stepping into the unknown. But by the end of the six-month tour, I realized I had achieved something incredible, and it gave me a foundation of self-belief. I began building my confidence by focusing on what I could control—practicing my craft, learning from every experience, and celebrating small victories. Read more>>
Maša Vujadinović
I think this is something I am still working on daily and will probably continue to work on my whole life. Being an independent artist can be very difficult at times and can pût you in a very sensitive place, which easily affects the confidence and self-esteem. It’s easy to start comparing yourself to others, wait for for an outside validation, etc. but in the end, I believe that the confidence lays within us and in our “why”, so I try to remind myself of that as much as I can. We all choose to pursue something for a reason and it’s often bigger and stronger than us alone, so we should trust it. Read more>>
Nicola Nakase
I wasn’t born with high self-esteem, but it was developed from my environment and experiences. My parents enrolled me in a lot of extracurricular activities as a child. From dance classes to art classes to piano, I got to dip my toe in everything. When my dad’s business started to become more successful when I was about 8 years old, he had more free time to spend with my sisters and I. That is when he started coaching us in playing basketball. Through playing sports, I feel like I developed very a strong sense of self. We trained very hard and played year around for many years. Learning that hard work and practice produces results gave me confidence. I’ve also had injuries and losses while playing which built up ability to be resilient and endure stress. These lessons early in my life have given me the temperament and personality to be a business owner. Read more>>
Rachel Florence Myer
Growing up, I lived in a rural town in southwestern Pennsylvania and was a super quiet, reserved kid who was often labeled as “shy”. (I’ve always despised being called this. It’s actually an idea I’ve had for a new book!)
Thankfully, through the encouragement of others and various life experiences, I’ve learned that confidence grows through taking risks and trying new things. For me, I had to push through the initial anxiety and say “You know what? I’m just going to do it”. I had to get comfortable with being uncomfortable (and still continuously work on this). Read more>>
Sarah Tuck
In order to build confidence, you have to be able to set a goal and stick with it to be able to reach your goals and accomplishments you are reaching for. Once this has been done then you would want to involve yourself in a complex society that can relate to what you are doing. Being around people who mold themselves into different forms of art. Gives you the opportunity to express your true abilities of being who you are. Seeing, hearing and feeling the different vibes will be an avenue for you to fit in even more to express what you have to offer as well. For example, I’m an Author, who has been writing professionally since May 2014, and my skills have advanced into playwriting, movie scripts, newspaper ads, talk show scripts etc. Read more>>
Tatiana A Pena
Developing confidence and self-esteem has been a journey of embracing both my strengths and imperfections. A big part of that has been finding what I truly love, like showcasing Iowa’s hidden gems, and sharing that passion with others. It’s through staying authentic and consistent that I’ve been able to build confidence, while forming meaningful connections with those who appreciate what I do. As a Latina and an immigrant, my accent is a reminder of my roots and resilience. Rather than seeing it as something to hide, I’ve learned to embrace it as a strength. It connects me to my heritage and serves as a reminder that owning my identity and staying true to myself is what makes me unique. It’s about growing through what you love and letting that journey define who you are. Read more>>
Shannon Wiggins
It has become evident to me that love/confidence is not an external entity to be sought but rather a state of being that must first be nurtured internally. While the ability to receive love from others is amazing , the most critical form of love is self-love. Developing a healthy sense of self-worth can address deep-seated insecurities and enable the projection of a positive self-image, thereby fostering healthier interpersonal dynamics. As the saying goes, “confidence is key,” because how you view yourself shapes how the world perceives you. When you embrace confidence, that’s exactly what others will see. Read more>>
Jamariah Kelly
I developed my confidence and self esteem when I moved from Connecticut to Atlanta. I had never been gasped at in awe or asked “what are you? Where are you from?” Every where I went here, I was called “pretty black” or “gorgeous”. Growing up dark skinned & curvier, up north was hell tbh. I was the butt of every dark skinned joke, I was referred to as black and not in a complimentary way. I had to hear it from strangers to actually see it because my family either never mentioned my beauty out loud. I started to really see my beauty and embrace my smooth sepia skin. Read more>>
Jamie Crain
I gained my confidence and self-esteem through a deep journey of understanding my energy and learning how to trust my intuition. As an energy healer, I’ve found that intuition is often difficult to rely on because it isn’t always tangible or immediately clear. However, as I became more in tune with my own energy, I discovered that the real source of my confidence came from understanding and protecting my energy. Read more>>
Cloyce Martin
It is definitely important to develop your confidence, ideally as early into your journey as possible. Failure to develop in this one area often creates the most hurdles to success in both the short and long term, preventing people from kickstarting their ideas and building the life they want for themselves. Read more>>
Zakiya Janae
Styling can be a powerful way to rebuild confidence and reclaim your identity; especially for a young Black woman who has faced struggles that left me feeling disconnected or lost. Clothes are more than just fashion; they’re a tool for self-expression and empowerment. Through style, you can express your emotions, values, and cultural pride in ways that feel true to you, helping to reconnect with the parts of yourself that were silenced or overlooked. Read more>>
Kimberly Terry
My confidence and self-esteem develops stronger as I mature in life and in God. As a child, I was always different. And being naturally different is not always fun as a child. I was a tall and very developed, and was teased because of it. I was also very artistic and involved in performing arts. Being nvolved in performing arts; dance, theatre, and orchestra, helped me to build my confidence and self-esteem because it required me to have and display confidence in my performances.
Believing in myself motivated me to become a fashion designer and start my own fashion business. My faith and growth in God revealed my purpose in life. I now understand why He made me different, and I know who He created me to be. This is the highest confidence a person can have! Read more>>
Suni Mullen
My confidence has strengthened with each experience I decide to take on. I challenge myself to acquire new skills through participation. I volunteer myself to activities that will directly target weaknesses I have become aware of within myself.
Because I intend to spend my life meeting new people, what I do in my personal life, allows me to connect with others when I am out and about: honoring my own cadence, as well as how others decide to show up, I recognize what I need. My ability to surrender to my tempo when observing, learning, and exploring is directly connected to my show of confidence. My confidence also includes the lack of and my awareness of this, extends grace to myself in those moments. Read more>>
Giovanna Natty
I’d say I’ve always been confident from a young age. Naturally, I’ve always been bold, but my self-esteem developed from the positive affirmations I grew up hearing. As a child, being constantly told by my loved ones that I was beautiful, funny, and full of character made me feel unique, and I truly believed it. Maintaining the confidence rooted in me comes mainly from taking good care of myself and doing what I say I will do. I’ve built a solid level of trust within myself, so I feel good about various aspects of my life and the different areas I’m involved in, as long as I’ve tried my best. It’s also about knowing that no two people are alike which means I’m special, you are too. Reminding myself how far I’ve come, the growth in mindset, and the milestones I’ve pushed myself to reach aids in making me feel confident. Read more>>
Christine Vonrobarie
Developing confidence and self-esteem took time. I found my confidence in 2023 while shooting my first feature film, “Peninsula Nights,” and experienced a significant boost in my self-esteem throughout 2024, surprisingly thanks to social media. I had wanted to start posting on social media for a long time but never had the courage. Then, I realized that if I wanted to build a name for myself and find acting representation, I needed a strong social media presence. However, I was terrified of my family and friends seeing me, and I feared receiving negative comments from strangers. It’s interesting to reflect on how fear has been a recurring feeling throughout my journey, and how not allowing it to become an obstacle has opened up a world of amazing experiences. Read more>>
Cooper Foster
My confidence comes from never caring about what other people are doing in their life or career-wise, or what they think of me. None of that is any of my business. It’s never been a competition between me and everyone else, just a drive between me and the version of me I want to be in the future. I’ve always felt like I was on an island. I embrace my uniqueness, I’ve always been seen as the “weird” one in my family, which reinforced my belief that fitting in was never a requirement. From a young age, I had a clear understanding of who I am and what I love. I’ve always felt that there are no barriers between my dreams and reality; I truly believe that anything is achievable. Read more>>
Krystin Railing
Developing self-confidence and self-esteem is honestly an ongoing process, like exercising a muscle. I am fortunate that my mother helped me develop confidence from an early age, and for me, it was shaped by a mix of internal monologue, and persistence. Confidence isn’t a destination; it’s a practice. By continuing to show up, learn, and celebrate progress, anyone can build their self-esteem and unlock their potential. Read more>>
Kim Ludeman
I have always felt confident but had terrible self-esteem. Growing up, I was fearless about putting myself out there and taking up space. However, I always worried if I was doing it “right” or if I was “good enough”. I would “should” on myself and used my confidence and bravado to cover up my low self-esteem. I think it is entirely possible for someone with low self-esteem to have oodles of confidence. In fact, a lot of people make up for the lack of self-compassion with confidence and the ability to be bold in social situations. For me, the congruence of the two has been a life long process. The biggest key has been practicing curiosity over criticism. This has allowed me to observe the internal stories and beliefs that I have about myself and my worth. Read more>>
Shant’a Miller White
How did I develop confidence and self esteem? Great question.. As a child growing up my Grandparents and Godfather constantly poured into me that I was beautiful and amazing! In spite of the situations going on around me I was going to be someone special! Those daily affirmations still stick with me to this day. My Grandparents have passed on but those words and actions are with me daily. Read more>>
Sam Demase
By giving myself permission to get to know myself, fully. And owning what makes me unique. That became my superpower. Read more>>
Samantha Dipippa
I developed my confidence and self-esteem in recent years of consistency. Because confidence and self-esteem are not fixed traits; they can be developed and strengthened over time with consistent effort.
My small following on Instagram all happened because of a couple of things. One, I love to take pictures to always remember what I have experienced. I got this from my grandmother, we used to take photos of everything and scrapbook them when I was younger. Posting on my page is my digital scrapbook and this has helped my confidence. It has grown throughout my posting on Instagram. That’s where my motto and user name come from CreateSimply412. To me, every post doesn’t need to be thought about in super depths. If you want to post do it because you can post something simple or extravagant. Collaborations are different obviously because those are business transactions and there are guidelines and boundaries. Read more>>
George Kocar
My confidence and self-esteem came when I developed my skills that they met professional standards. I started drawing and painting as a young kid. I knew I could do this better then most of my peers, and getting praise from my teachers always helps. After high school, a stint in the Army, I started college, put the nose to the grindstone, earned top grades, and started getting art jobs. After college, I started freelancing for many of Cleveland’s Ad agencies, publications, etc. I developed my style that I am known for while doing this. I went to Syracuse University to gain my MFA, and started getting national jobs from across the country. Read more>>
